Keeping the faith.

I’m sitting here patiently waiting for the miracle to happen as I look at my zero balance account. After years of research, hard work, dedication, sacrifice...all the ingredients that makes you a success story, I feel like I have over a million dollars in my account. I laughed at myself because I’m either in complete denial and on the verge of a mental breakdown or this is what they mean by the home stretch. I’m so excited about my life that I can barely breath, like the other shoe is about to fall but in a good way.

I wish I could put into the words the emotion that I’m feeling but I don’t think there’s a word invented yet, it’s just one of those things you’d have to go through it to understand.

Looking back on my life, there was a time when the future had no meaning to me, I survived my life on a daily basis because I had to, not because I wanted to. I didn‘t live it, nor did I have any concept on how to even go about getting a life if I wanted one, so I just didn’t think about.

Until one night, there was a defining moment where I had to choose between a nip of vodka or my life. I knew that, that was my moment. I was at my lowest point in my life, coudn’t get any lower if I dug the hole myself and I had to make a decision on which path I was going to take. Clearly, I made the right decision as you can see, I chose to walk in the light that GOD had been trying to show me for years because I was no longer going to live a life that I didn’t pick for myself. I stopped putting my energy into being a disappointment and failure, I mean I played the part very well, I tried to be all the negative things that people predicted I was going to be but it didn’t feel right, it never had, so for the first time in my life, I stuck up for myself and chose me.

Don’t let people‘s opinion of you become your fact. Love the skin you’re in, feel the strength of who you are radiate around you as you breath life in and out of your body. We don’t have time to give our positive energy into what people aren’t going to understand, it’s not their vision, it’s yours and yours alone to feed it, nurture it and breathe life into it.

Family and friends will not understand your passion, your determination and faith in something that to the rest of the world seems to be ruining you. My passion to change my life is so strong that I’m willing to face anything to accomlish it. I never knew that my body could hold so much life for something that can’t be seen, except by me and I guard it with my entire being because, it is my life.

When you finally get to the point where you want to make a change, the ability to execute your passion for whatever your want with unwavering faith will be unlike anything you’ve ever felt before. You’re going to find more strengths in you that you never knew you had. You’ll be more creative and happy, you’ll find and fall in love with the real you.

so whatever you do in life do with purpose. As long as you live your best life hand and hand with faith doing what you love, the universe will open up the heavens and you will be blessed with success and abundance.

Just be patient with yourself, know that you’re not perfect and it’s ok to make a mistakes. The only opinion that will only matter in those mistakes are yours, you are you’re own worst critic. Please don’t take what anyone says to heart which I know is hard but I can show you how to develop a Teflon skin if you decide you’d like to work worth, I’m a pusher with purpose, lol.

Keep doing what you’re doing, keep fighting for your life, you’re worth it, always and forever.